First Chapter: Starlight
Birthday celebrations were dumb. They were even dumber when you turned the non-milestone age of thirty-four and your best friend dragged you into the local brewpub, insisting you needed a birthday beer.
Birthday Wish #1: Get a new best friend.
Though the Goldenpour I currently nursed was ice cold and amazing, I didn’t need a birthday beer. What I needed was to get home to Kolton so Mrs. Lilly could end her shift as nanny-housekeeper-tutor-superhero. That was exactly what I told Nate, my former best friend, when he insisted on this detour to Speakeasy Taproom, in our hometown of Colebury, Vermont. Of course he’d already contacted Mrs. Lilly who had immediately volunteered to stay longer to watch my ten-year-old son.
“See?” Nate had jostled my shoulder at today’s job site. “Everything is all set, dude. I’ve bought you a few hours of merriment.”
“I don’t need merriment.” I’d finished packing up my masonry tools for the fireplace job Nate and I had been working on.
“Anybody listening to the way you uttered that would definitely agree you need merriment, Darren.” Nate loaded his own tools into my truck. “Like, dump truck loads of it.”
His way of saying I was a grouch apparently. Whatever. I was tired and wanted to spend some time with Kolton before his bedtime rolled around. My original birthday plans included playing a video game with my son before bed, taking a long, hot shower, and burrowing under the sheets so I could get up the next morning and continue the fireplace job. I’d built my business, Reade Masonry, on the principles of hard work and sticking to timetables. My clients enjoyed those principles and that was how I received referrals for new jobs. That was how I kept us busy day after day. That was how the money flowed in.
Birthday Wish #2: Keep the money flowing in.
I took a swig of beer from the tall glass Lily, the bartender, had placed in front of me. I mean, now that we were here I couldn’t let a perfectly cold beer go to waste. Plus, if I drank this one, maybe Nate would be satisfied and let me leave when the glass was empty.
I downed another gulp, hoping to speed up the process. My gaze landed on the board behind the bar where the words Life is short. Eat the cupcake! were scrawled. No doubt Lily’s doing. She always had some motivational crap up there. Eat the cupcake. Seize the day. Blah, blah.
Swiveling on my stool, I took in the taproom around me. You didn’t have to be a mason to know the old brick mill building was solidly built. Its location against the Winooski River was a nice feature and the giant leaded glass windows were eye-catching. The rough-hewn floorboards had a ton of character too. If I hadn’t been so damn exhausted—and grouchy—I’d have enjoyed the atmosphere.
When I turned back toward the bar and a cupcake with a lit candle in it showed up, I raised an eyebrow at Nate.
“What?” He arrowed his hands toward the chocolate confection. “You need a candle to make your birthday wish, man. This is how birthday’s work.”
“I wish you didn’t know it was my birthday.” I also wished he remembered I didn’t like cupcakes even if it was a chocolate one from The Busy Bean Café in town.
“C’mon, Darren. Humor me.” Nate nudged the plate holding the cupcake closer to me.
“I’m sitting here with a beer.” I wiggled my glass. “I’m humoring you.”
Nate’s shoulders slumped and maybe I felt a little bad about being such a grump. Maybe.
“Why are you so against celebrating your birthday this year? I’ve always had to convince you a little bit, but you’re really not feeling it today.”
I didn’t have an answer for him so I blew out the candle and met his gaze. “Happy?”
“No. I’m not going to be happy until you’re happy.” Nate pulled the candle out of the cupcake and proceeded to eat it. I guess he did remember I didn’t like cupcakes.
Or he was just following Lily’s advice. I glanced at the board again, now noticing the cupcake-with-candles drawing beside the words. Lily mouthed Happy Birthday to me and gave me a wink before delivering drinks to customers at the other end of the bar.
“I’m happy, Nate.” I swiped at the sweat rolling down my glass, creating a little pool of water on the bar top.
“People who are happy don’t have to say the words I’m happy.” Nate licked chocolate frosting off his finger. “Is something up with Kolton?”
“Something is always up with Kolton.” I puffed out a breath. “I have a meeting scheduled at his school. A team—not just one teacher—wants to talk to me about him.” I rubbed the back of my neck which was always a little sore after a day of sorting through stones and selecting the perfect ones for whatever we were building.
“A team?” Nate frowned. “That does sound serious.”
“The school year just started and I know he’s not doing that great,” I said, “but I didn’t think things were so bad. This meeting has me worried.”
Nate clamped his hand on my shoulder. “You’re doing what you can for him.”
“Am I?” My hands dropped to my thighs, a small cloud of stone dust pluming out around us. “He’s been with me for five years now and in the beginning, things were okay. Now that he’s ten more problems keep popping up.” I blew out a breath. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
“Yes, you do. You’re giving the kid a home—a kid that’s not even yours—and you’re helping him navigate his situation.” Nate brushed cupcake crumbs from his lap, sending up his own dusty cloud from his jeans. “Maybe you’ll get the help you need from this school meeting.”
I hadn’t expected to be the father of an adopted kid with severe anxiety and depression. Kolton hadn’t expected to see what he’d seen or to be left with debilitating panic attacks because of it, but I couldn’t wipe his memory clean.
Birthday Wish #3: Wipe Kolton’s memory clean.
“I’m not sure what else the school can do,” I said. “They have offered every support under the sun for Kolton and his progress has been minimal. I don’t know what’s left to try.”
“That’s why you’ll go to the meeting and find out.” Nate motioned to Lily for two more beers. When they arrived, he held up his glass. “To Darren. A great boss, a greater friend, and the greatest father that kid could have ended up with. I’m sure thirty-four is going to be your year. Happy birthday, bro.”
Despite my not wanting to be here, Nate’s words touched me. I tapped my second beer to his. “Thanks, man.”
Piano music made us turn on our bar stools to face Speakeasy’s small stage. A circle of light hit the shiny black surface of a piano then widened to reveal a woman in a shimmery, peach-colored dress, sitting on the bench and playing a jazzy melody on the keys. Her back was to us, but her golden hair was up in a complicated twist, showcasing a long, slender neck. The cut of her dress exposed toned shoulders and arms. Some black ink decorated her left shoulder, but I couldn’t make out the tattoo’s specific image from this distance.
She played for several moments then wrapped up the tune to much applause. A man took her place on the piano bench. When she stood and approached a microphone stand at the front of the stage, I nearly fell off my stool. I had never understood when someone described something as breathtaking.
Now I got it.
Nate leaned toward me, jabbing me in the ribs with his elbow. “Figured out your birthday wish, didn’t you?”
I blinked at my grinning friend, not able to form words. Returning my gaze to the absolute angel on the stage, I took in the way that dress hugged her curves, offering up a peek at the plump tops of her breasts. The fabric stretched all the way down to the floor, but one long slit up the front allowed me a gander at a shapely leg. Big, blue eyes glittered in the stage lights and her golden hair took on a caramel shade.
I might not like cupcakes, but I could definitely do an all-caramel diet.
This woman’s appearance was a throwback to the age of jazz and I suddenly wanted suspenders and a pair of wingtips so I could join her on that stage. When she wrapped her hand around the microphone and sang, her bluesy, soulful voice was like a lasso, roping me in one shot and cinching tightly. I had never seen or heard anything so utterly beautiful.
Birthday Wish #4? Yeah, I couldn’t articulate what I wanted to do with her because all my blood had rushed to one part of me, leaving my brain shit out of luck.
She sang for forty-five minutes and I was completely entranced for every second of that time. I couldn’t tell you a single lyric she’d sung, but I knew how her eyes closed during the piano riffs, how her left foot kept time with rhythmic toe taps, how her hips swayed, and how her husky voice hypnotized me.
And probably every other jerk in the brewpub.
I scanned the tables between me and the stage and yeah, men and women were fixated on her. How could they not be? She was alluring in every sense of the word.
A tiny part of my brain still functioned and reminded me that she was, however, still a woman. Generally speaking, I tended to avoid that fifty percent of the human population. I’d gotten involved with some doozies in the past and wasn’t prepared to add to The Doozy Pile. I had enough on my plate with taking care of Kolton and running my own masonry business. I didn’t need the complications a woman—and certainly this one on the stage in particular—would bring into my life.
I had to snap out of it and tell my dick to go back to sleep. Which would have been a simple thing to do, except when her set was over, this goddess of jazz stepped off the stage and meandered through the brewpub, stopping at tables to chat and smile and basically be charming as hell. The moment her lilting laugh hit my ears, I knew I was in trouble.
Before I had a chance to lullaby my cock back into hibernation, that sexy peach dress appeared between Nate and me. Delicate elbows rested on the bar as my entire body heated.
Early September in Vermont didn’t generally have scorching temperatures, but I was burning up. I pulled at my T-shirt, hoping to let some air at my overheated flesh.
“You were amazing,” Nate said. “I didn’t catch your name though.”
This vision of perfection gave me a quick glance—nearly liquefying me—then turned toward Nate. “Sasha Soul, performing jazz on Tuesdays and Thursdays at Speakeasy.” She held out her hand to shake Nate’s. Her speaking voice snagged something deep inside me with its harmonious tone.
“What can I get you, Sasha?” Lily asked.
“Pinot noir, Lily. Thanks.” She tapped a long, slender finger on the bar edge then peeked at me through thick lashes. “Did you enjoy the show?”
I opened my mouth, to say what I don’t know, but Nate spoke instead.
“Of course he did. Today’s his birthday.” He peered at me around Sasha and wiggled his eyebrows while mouthing she’s so fucking hot.
My fist curled at my buddy thinking she was hot, but of course he’d think that. She was hot. Fucking hot.
Sasha turned completely to face me now and I was treated to a prime view of her, up close and personal. She was truly flawless . . . except for a circular patch of scar tissue on her left arm, right at the elbow crease.
Her gaze traveled down to where mine was and she ran her index finger along the puckered skin, a small smile tugging up the right side of her mouth. “Dog bite, but that poochie and I ended up being great friends.”
I held up my left arm and pointed to a long, ragged scar on my forearm. “Masonry blade. Great on stones, horrible on flesh.”
Her laugh made me close my eyes for a moment so I could fully enjoy the sound.
“Nice to meet you, Birthday Boy.” She leaned on her elbow against the bar.
Ignoring Nate, who was making all manner of inappropriate gestures behind her, I had the good sense to hold out my hand. “Likewise.”
Her hand slid against mine and I let myself wonder if her skin was that soft everywhere. It probably was and that gave my tongue some specific ideas about tasting her. My dick agreed with my tongue. Wholeheartedly.
She picked up the wine Lily had left for her and held up the glass to me. “Happy birthday.”
I clinked my beer against her glass and we both took sips. A small portion of my brain registered the fact that Nate had slipped off his stool and backed toward the brewpub’s exit. I should have been more worried about that because he’d driven us to Speakeasy and I’d have no way to get home now, but I couldn’t seem to muster up the desire to care.
“How do you plan to celebrate your birthday?” Sasha asked.
“Drink a few beers, listen to some tunes, meet you . . . that’s as far as I got in making plans.”
Her lips quirked up again and I liked it far too much when that happened. “Hmm . . .” She turned toward Nate’s abandoned stool. “Hey, what happened to your friend?”
“I think he left which means I’m stranded here.”
Another smile came my way only this one was bigger. “Well, we can’t have you stranded on your birthday.” She leaned in closer and a fresh, peachy scent enveloped me. “Will you let me add to your plans tonight, Birthday Boy?”
I managed a nod as she took a final sip of her wine. With a wave to Lily, Sasha took my hand and tugged me off my stool. I should be calling a ride. I should be getting home.
But I didn’t do either of those things.
Instead I followed Sasha out of Speakeasy and to a blue pickup truck. “I know a perfect spot where we can have a little fun and then I can give you a lift home. You’re a local Colebury guy, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Great.” A click sounded as she unlocked the doors of her vehicle. “Get in.”
I paused a few feet from the truck as she climbed into the driver’s seat. What in the world was I doing? The Darren Reade I’d known for thirty-four years would not get into a random woman’s car. That guy avoided women in the name of self-preservation. That guy expended too much energy on a kid who wasn’t his own flesh and blood. That guy spent every day among stones and mortar to fund his simple life.
Had the arrival of my birthday turned me into some other guy? One who opened the passenger door and got into Sasha’s truck right now? One who desperately wanted to see what ideas this woman had for celebrating my birthday?
One who wanted to strip that dress off her and worship every inch of her amazing body?
“Breathe, Birthday Boy.” Sasha’s hand on my forearm ripped me out of my musings. She traced the scar on my arm with her index finger. “We’re just going to have some fun.”
Life is short. Eat the cupcake!
She started the engine. The image of her reversing a basic pickup out of a brewpub parking spot while dressed like a jazz icon of the past amused me.
“So I’ve never seen you at Speakeasy.” Sasha pulled the truck onto the road.
“I come here, but only on Friday and Saturday nights, I think.”
“Don’t tend to go out on school nights?” She arched an eyebrow, but she kept her gaze on the road.
“Not really.”
“But today is a special occasion, right?”
“Sure. Okay.”
She glanced my way. “A birthday is definitely a special occasion. How old are you?”
“Thirty-four.”
“Congratulations. Some people don’t make it that far.”
I knew that firsthand. Some people didn’t make it past their first minutes in this world. I pushed that notion aside though, not wanting it to ruin this impromptu birthday celebration. If things were headed where I thought they were headed, keeping it light and carefree was key. Otherwise this would all have to mean something and I wasn’t signing up for that.
No way.
Sasha turned on the radio, loud enough that conversation wasn’t feasible. Fine by me. Though she was absolutely gorgeous, I didn’t want to do the small talk thing and get to know her.
Ten minutes later, she pulled her truck to a stop by a body of water. One I recognized because I lived on the other side of it. She’d reversed so the bed of the truck was facing the river.
“This is one of my favorite Vermont spots.” Sasha reached behind my seat and pulled out a thick flannel blanket. “C’mon, Birthday Boy.”
She got out of the truck so I followed her and helped her line the bed with the blanket. She’d left the driver side door open so the bed was illuminated by the light above the back window. The September air still smelled faintly of summer wildflowers and damp soil, and crickets sang their nighttime songs. Woods bordered this section of the river with houses—including mine—on the other side.
“I’d better get rid of this dress before I ruin it.” Sasha turned around, exposing her back to me. “Can you unzip me?”
Was it going to be this easy? Unzip and she’d be naked before me?
My conscience reared its pious head as I weighed the pros and cons of what was about to unfold here.
“Birthday Boy?” Sasha glanced at me over her shoulder. “You’re not shy, are you? We’re two adults and I’m more than willing to wish you a proper happy birthday tonight.” Her eyebrow arched over a blue eye, so how was a guy supposed to resist what was being offered? It’d been a while since I’d gotten laid—too much of a while honestly—and she was right. We were two adults. Hooking up was natural. Nothing wrong with it. It was my birthday after all.
And she was going to ruin that dress out here.
I closed the distance between us and slowly pulled down the zipper at the back of her dress. It made a soft zzzip and the cricketsong halted for a moment before starting back up again. At least only crickets were out here to see what was going on. Maybe an owl or two as well.
Sasha wasn’t wearing a bra so an uninterrupted stretch of pale skin greeted me as the sides of the dress pulled away from her back. In the light offered by the truck, I caught a glimpse of that tattoo on her left shoulder. A dog pawprint, but made of hearts. So she loved dogs. That had to mean she was a good person, right?
She gathered the bottom of the dress and slid the entire garment up over her head so it wouldn’t touch the dirty ground at her feet. In nothing but peach-colored panties and a pair of gold heels, she folded the dress twice and set it on the driver’s seat. She pulled at her hair and caramel curls tumbled down about her shoulders as she turned to face me.
I had difficulty keeping my gaze on her face, knowing her breasts were right there, exposed to the night, but somehow I managed the impossible.
The slight grin on her lips told me she’d noted my feat. “You can look.” She took several steps closer so she was within reach. “In fact, you can do more than look.” A second later, her hand took mine. She uncurled my fingers and placed my palm on her breast.
We both let out a moan and that was the green light for me. No holding back now. My other arm wrapped around her back and pressed her against my front. Her sharp intake of breath indicated I’d surprised her with my sudden move, but she quickly relaxed into my hold, her hips doing a subtle grind against me that made my dick say hell no to hibernation. He was awake now. And ready.
So ready.
I scooped her up into my arms and walked to the bed of the truck. Setting her on the open tailgate, I slipped off her heels, placing them aside, and ran my hands along her thighs, groaning when she opened her legs wider under my touch. She backed up farther into the bed and I climbed up, slinking my way over her. I paused to remove my work boots then hovered over her again. Pushing on my chest, Sasha made enough room between us so she could grab the bottom of my T-shirt and peel it off me. I unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans, but let her scrape them and my boxer briefs down over my hips.
She let out a little sigh at the sight of my erection and I have to say, I loved that sound.
“Why do I feel as if it’s my birthday?” She reached up to my shoulders and pulled me down to her. Her lips pressed to mine and that merriment Nate had talked about came flooding through me.
I shoved my jeans and underwear all the way down my legs and kicked myself free of both, not much caring where my dusty clothes landed. Until I remembered a condom. The one that was tucked into my wallet for just-in-cases that never happened.
Until tonight.
Taking a few moments to get back to enjoying the way Sasha’s mouth felt against mine, I reached my arm out, my hand groping for my jeans. Sasha realized what I was attempting. She paused in her kissing so I could concentrate on fishing my wallet out of my back pocket and finding the condom.
“A prepared birthday boy.” She plucked the packet from my hand and set it aside. “Let’s play first.”
Her hand wrapped around my cock and I sucked in a breath as she stroked me. Up and down, up and down, her fingers tightening on my tip and making me feel a little lightheaded. What was it about this woman? I never did the one-night stand thing. This was so unlike me, but being with her like this right now felt so incredible. Maybe a parasitic alien had made my body its host, causing me to act in ways contrary to my normal personality, but hey, I wasn’t going to argue with it. Not when fucking hot Sasha Soul was beneath me and a starlit Vermont sky was above me.
I took control of Sasha’s mouth again and when I traced the seam of her lips with my tongue, she opened for me. Sliding my tongue along hers sent a jolt through me and her hand stroked me a little harder, a little faster. I trailed kisses along her jaw, down her neck, over her collarbone, pausing every now and then to peek at her face. Her eyes were closed, but her lower lip was caught between her teeth and she wriggled beneath me, her breasts brushing against my chest. The bed light illuminated her hair, turning those caramel strands to gold.
Traveling down her body, I made stops at her breasts, kneading the mounds before taking each in my mouth to pull more sexy sounds from her throat. I slid farther south and tested her core with a finger, finding her hot and wet and ready.
“Let’s get that condom on you.” Her words came out breathy and strained.
I pressed kisses to her stomach, smiling against her skin. “Hey, you’re the one who wanted to play first.”
She dug her fingers into my shoulders then cupped my balls. “I changed my mind.”
After nipping at her hip, I rested on my knees, a leg on either side of her, and grabbed the condom. Quickly sheathing myself, I lowered to capture that mouth of hers again and the kiss went instantly supernova.
Sasha rubbed her leg along mine and when I finally guided myself into her core, we both shuddered at the joining. She was tight around me, but with each surge into her, I went deeper, deeper, deeper until I was so surrounded by her, I could have easily been completely consumed.
Instinct took over and we moved with each other in rhythmic thrusts that reminded me of a primal drumbeat. Something so elemental and natural and perfect. Something so unlike any sexual encounters I’d ever had. This was in its own category. One I couldn’t quite name.
More noises came from Sasha, urging me to give her my best possible performance. She wrapped her legs around my hips and raked her fingers along my scalp as she pulled me closer so she could reach my mouth. We kissed as I plunged in and out of her and when we reached the edge, I pulled out almost entirely, teasing her for a moment, only to rush back in and send us both tumbling.
My body shook as she spasmed around me, the warmish September night doing nothing to cool me off as we rode this wave together. When only aftershocks remained, I freed myself from her and rolled to her side. My chest heaved up and down as I stared at the stars above us and caught my breath. The starlight tonight was intense or was it that everything seemed more vibrant after being deep inside Sasha Soul?
She turned her head to face me.“Happy Birthday to you.”
“Thanks.” Man, was I glad Nate had forced me to go to Speakeasy. I’d have to pay Mrs. Lilly extra for staying with Kolton, but it had been worth every cent.
I took care of the condom then pulled the sides of the blanket over us so we were covered. Sasha fit herself against my side and I interlaced our fingers, resting our hands on my stomach. We stayed there like that in the bed of her truck for a while, stargazing and breathing and… existing. A few stray frogs added their croaks to the cricket chirps and bats flapped by overhead, but we didn’t move. I don’t think I’d ever been that in tune with my body or someone else’s. I swore I could feel Sasha’s heartbeat in my own chest, as if I’d stolen something from deep inside her during our exchange.
“I should get you home.” Her voice was little more than a whisper, but I’d heard her words. Didn’t care for them. Right after work, all I’d wanted to do was go home, but now?
Now I wanted to lie beside her. Like forever.
But she was right. I had to get home. We’d had some fun. Nothing more.
I let go of her hand when she pulled away and sat up when she did. “That was . . .” Nice? Amazing? Profound? “. . . great.”
Sasha gave me a half smile then leaned forward and brushed her lips against my cheek in a soft kiss. “It was great. I hope you find your thirty-fourth year to be a rewarding one.” She slid away and hopped off the tailgate.
Her naked form walked to the cab and rustled around in the back. When she came back to the bed, she wore a simple black cotton dress that resembled an oversized T-shirt.
And still looked hot as hell wearing it.
Realizing I was staring, I snapped out of it and quickly pulled on my own clothes. I sat on the tailgate to put on my work boots then jumped down and closed the tailgate. I wanted to say more to Sasha, but I wasn’t sure what direction to take. The way she marched to the driver’s side after folding up the flannel blanket told me not to say anything. She was done with our fun.
I was, too, of course. This was nothing more than a special birthday treat. It certainly had improved my attitude toward my birthday and had reminded me how much fun sex was. I’d forgotten. It’d been so long.
I climbed into the passenger seat and pointed across the river. “I live over there.”
“Okay.” Sasha started the truck. “I’ll follow the road around to that side and you tell me when to stop.”
I nodded and we were off, the truck’s rumbly engine and the radio the only sounds between us. My body felt good. Well-used and sated. My head, however, was a different story. Probably why I didn’t do this often. My mom had raised me to be a gentleman, but that hadn’t gone well for me. In fact, that had been a total disaster.
Twice so far.
Perhaps what Sasha and I had done was the way to go. Get down to business then call it a night. No emotions. No regrets. No promises. Just two bodies coming together to release some steam then breaking apart to be on their separate ways.
Yeah. This was good. This was what I’d needed. I’d have to thank Nate tomorrow.
“That’s my house right there.” I pointed to the barn on the right side of the road.
“That doesn’t look like a house.” Sasha squinted out the windshield. “Do you live with horses?”
“No.” I almost told her I lived with a ten-year-old boy, but that would have been personal information and we hadn’t exchanged any of that, had we? “This barn has been converted into a livable space though.”
“Cool.” Before I could say anything more, she leaned over and dropped a kiss on my lips. A quick, friendly peck. “Good night, Birthday Boy.”
In other words, Get out of my truck now.
“Good night, Miss Soul.”
She chuckled and I realized that Sasha Soul probably wasn’t her real name. Asking her for her real name, however, felt personal and we weren’t doing that, were we?
I opened the passenger door and got out of the truck. Movement beyond the first large window on the bottom floor of the barn told me Mrs. Lilly was watching so I closed the door after giving Sasha a wave. As I walked toward the barn, Sasha pulled her truck back onto the main road and drove off.
Her taillights disappeared into the darkness and I half wondered if I’d imagined all of tonight’s events.
I licked my lips and the taste of Sasha told me I hadn’t.